Mother Daughter Relationship

THE house is quiet except for the music on iTunes playing from Nek Yong’s computer. It’s a Saturday and the girls have gone to visit their Nenek (grandmother) living outside of Kuala Lumpur.

Despite the beautiful day, Nek Yong is feeling a wee bit sad today. Over a late breakfast I found out my younger daughter had kept her break-up with her boyfriend a secret from me for a whole month. Imagine, a whole month! And I thought we were THICK! Like serious thick! Like hardened-butter-placed-in-an-overly-cold-section-of-the-fridge THICK!

When I found out the truth, my jaw actually dropped. I stared at her unbelievingly. She in turn had the nerve to laugh and said to her sister as she pointed at me: “Look at mum’s face!”

Luckily her sister didn’t find it funny or someone would have received a few thwacks on the head by the time I recovered.

Do we have a hole in our love?

 Image: Love Food - CYBERSNOT

 http://www.sxc.hu/

The truth is, Nek Yong would still not know about the break-up if my eldest daughter had not “forced” everyone to listen to her dream.

My eldest daughter has what we called “odd moments of verbal diarrhoea”. And when she has one of these sessions, she couldn’t care less if the sky is falling. She’d continue her story as everyone keeps rolling their eyes to heaven, a hint that doesn’t seem to have any effect on my eldest girl.

This was how it started. My elder daughter said: “You know I had this weird dream. I was talking to your boyfriend and asking him why did you guys break up?” At the end of that sentence my eldest daughter turned to look at her sister who, just as suddenly said: “Memang pun (yeah, we did).” And that was the exact time my jaw dropped. And my eldest daughter’s jaw dropped as well.

We were in disbelief.

When I finally found my voice I said: “And it’s been sometime?” It was an accusation rather than an assumption.

My younger daughter acknowledged it. She said: “January,” before adding, “after New Year’s Day actually.”

All hell broke loose. My eldest daughter went on a how-can-you-not-tell-us-and-I’m-hurt mode while I went on a how-can-you-not-tell-us-'cos-we-tell-each-other-everything mode.

Did it surprise Nek Yong so badly? Yes, it did because the same thing happened when my younger daughter broke up with her first boyfriend. And, we only found out because I had this nagging suspicion and confronted her so she had to spill the beans.

You might be saying if she has done it before then it shouldn’t come as a surprise. But yes we were surprised because we had made sure when it happened the first time that she WILL NOT go through the pain alone should it happen again. And it happened again and she didn’t tell us and we are now questioning are we as thick as we thought we are really?

So okay, every one is entitle to how they want to handle their lives. Every one should have the choice to share or not to share their life but something inside of me is wondering. Does she trust me enough to share her happy as well as sad moments with? Is she only allowing me to see only her surface and nothing more? Are there more turmoil within her that I do not know or aware of or will ever get to know.

Now, as I sit alone writing this I remember what I last said to her one night as we were talking about guys and relationships. I said “if ever your guy hurt you I will break every bone in his body”. She had smiled at me. And I had said, “You’d better believe me.”

So as the three of us pondered over the why-s and what-s of the break up, I’m still assuming she had told me the truth when she said that the break up was mutual although she initiated it.

Since everyone looked so upset, she left the dining table. Her sister went over to her room to hug her. I went into the guest toilet and looked for excuses to scream bloody murder about.
Was I over-reacting? Yes, probably. But no one will know inside of me how much my girls mean to me. If they hurt, I hurt, even more badly. That is the truth of a single parent’s life.

With loving care - Nek Yong

New perfume from Avon

Quote for Day 48

Clipart: Witch On A Vac-TOM BROUGH

http://www.openclipart.org/

When I'm busy I'm never pretty - Anon

Chawan-ful of flavours

WHERE in Kuala Lumpur can you enjoy a huge bowl of Lontong Sotong at RM9.90 that's enough to be shared by two or three persons? I wouldn’t walk the city just to find this out but I know Chawan@Bangsar serves a generous portion of this dish.

A cup of Kopi Teluk Intan at Chawan@Bangsar.

If you’re no big eater then be prepared to either tapau (takeaway) or be at Chawan with one or two other friends so the dish isn’t wasted.

It’s been a while since I last came to Chawan, opened in June 2008. When it first opened the place was packed and it still is on most days today because both food and ambience go hand in hand.

A friendly customer gave me permission to shoot the drinks they ordered.
The drinks look and taste (according to them) delicious!

There’s nothing overly special with the outlet’s décor. The exterior is kept dark brown while inside is all gray. Simple bamboo blinds help give extra shade when the day is too hot or when there’s a light drizzle. But don’t ask me what happens when there’s a heavy downpour because I’ve not faced that situation as yet.

Customers seat themselves at either the cement benches that line the sides of the outlet or at the single kopitiam chairs and stools. The tables are zinc-topped, which I prefer as they don’t look as nasty as plastic tables when they are stained.

This is one Lontong dish I'd come back for more. Only at Chawan@Bangsar.

I know from the first day Chawan opened it has been getting a lot of reviews. Most of them are positive although some feel the food is pricey. I however feel RM9.90 for a huge serving of Lontong Sotong, a huge bowl of Lin Chee Kang at RM4.50 and a cup of Kopi Teluk Intan at RM3.80 is fair.

Besides the price this is one place that gives fast service – the wait staffs are fast to come to the table to take orders, they notice when a customer waves for service, the orders come on time and most importantly you’re getting quality food – loads of ingredients in the Lontong dish and nice thick, creamy santan (coconut milk) gravy.

Great on a hot, hot day - my serving of Lin Chee Kang.

Best of all is the level of cleanliness – no stained plates and saucers and cleaned, wiped tables, and yes, no serious litter on the floor.

I will always return to Chawan, not only for all these good reasons but also because it’s a nice place to chill at on a quite weekend just having nice food and enjoying a bit of Malaysian sun.Yes, even when you're just on your own and without company...but order small ;)

Chawan@Bangsar

69-G Jalan Telawi 3

Bangsar Baru

Kuala Lumpur

Tel: +6 03 2287 5507

Quote for Day 47

Image: Emo Signs - VIKUSH

http://www.sxc.hu/

When your heart rips in pain you wonder what God is saying - Anon

Pink But Not From Blushing

I love cafes and the smaller and more intimate they are the better. And, I love cafes that offer simple, quality food. The style of cooking, whether local, Western or any other types isn't a problem for my taste buds. My problems always start with bad service, something I have zero tolerance of.

A Saturday afternoon spent with old friends I've always planned to meet but never got to is my idea of a great chill-out session. The one I had last weekend was simply great.

Want to take a guess where I chill at with my friends?

There were so much laughter, even when two of the "friends of my friends" I've hardly met or known came to make the threesome into a fivesome.

Everyone has had their meal and drinks so that left me, the lone ranger who is always late for her food. I waived at the wait staff and he brought me the menu. Placing an order was fast because the menu is very impressive and the choices plenty.

My favourite late breakfast - waffle serves with butter.

Knowing full-well what I wanted and that was another light "breakast" (at tea time) to add to the single toast with choc drink in the morning, I pointed at the Waffle served with marmalade and butter. My favourite, a Flat White was to accompany the waffle.

As is the norm with me, my order, if it includes a Flat White, follows a specific pattern. The coffee must never come before the main food ordered. The coffee must come together with the food.

There's a simple logic to this - food outlets in Malaysia take ages to bring out the main meal. So if you were to order coffee, and the coffee comes to your table, it will be sorely cold by the time your food arrives. And what’s the golden rule for drinking coffee? Yes, drink it hot.

I like my coffee hot, please.

All's good as the wait staff gave me a smile, after taking my order and disappeared to the kitchen counter. The only problem was, he didn't come back with my food even after half an hour of waiting.

I waited, and waited, and waited. No, no food arrived. My girlfriend got edgy. By the look on her face I knew she was about to turn into a bitch, not that she isn't already even without anger seeping in.

When a wait staff finally got to our table and our queries answered, my coffee arrived. The waffle didn't. So I waited, and waited. And my girlfriend and her girlfriend got edgy. Only my girlfriend's husband had one nice thing to say: They are normally quite efficient.

After several long minutes, and the four decided they've waited long enough and that they have work to do, my waffle arrived, after the coffee of course, which arrived much earlier (not according to what was specified, right?). So they sat down again to accompany me.

The waffle looked good with a sprinkling of sugar powder on top of it. It was spongy and fluffy and brown, just the way I like it. And that was it. Neither the promised caramel nor butter were any where to be seen.

When I asked the wait staff about the missing condiments, he said, "Yes, we have but you have to ask for them."

Really? When they are actually already included in the menu?

Here's a tiny helping of butter. Enjoy.

The wait staff disappeared and then re-appeared with one, just one miserable tiny butter cube in his hands. No marmalade and just one tiny cube of butter. I was tempted to say: Shall I bring my tub of butter next time?

I ate silently. My girlfriend was pissed off but she had to leave. So she picked up the bill and paid her portion. I said I'd pay mine on a separate bill. They left.

Less than five minutes I decided to go because I've downed my coffee as it was getting cold. So I told the wait staff to please pack the remaining waffle. He did. No, no butter or marmalade included.

I asked for the bill. It was RM13.50. I asked why? He said they gave me complimentary coffee due to the delay with my food. I smiled at him, placed RM20 on the tray and said it was ok and left.

I wasn't about to make the wait staff pay for anything, even if it was their inefficiency that caused the delay.

So off I go. Five hours later my girlfriend called. "Did you pay for your food?" she asked. Of course I did. Her voice was fuming mad. First the delay in sending the coffee and waffle. Then they charged us twice! My girlfriend paid for my food and then they charged me again. Hello?

The Pink Sage can make a cool place to chill at - in the day or the evenings.

Today I got a message on my FB wall: "I got the waffle refunded." "The waffle". So now I'm wondering if they also refunded the bill for coffee, which they wanted to give me as complimentary to which I rejected. Hmm ...

In case anyone is wondering what happend to the waffle I packed home, well, I threw them in my kitchen bin.

I've been to the cafe and is impressed with the wait staff's mannerisms, the menu, the outlet in itself and even its website. But, I'm not impressed with the service. Now, if anyone can tell me it just happened to be my bad day then I have no reason to return to:

The Pink Sage Diner & Pantry
A4-UG-01 Solaris Dutamas
1 Jln Dutamas 1
50480 Kuala Lumpur
Malaysia
phone: +6016 205 2023
http://www.thepinksage.com/

Quote for Day 46

Image: Syairway To Heaven - COBRA SOFT
http://www.sxc.hu/ 

Not all that's in our mind is known to others - Anon

Quote for Day 45

Image: Flowing Blood-LUCRETIOUS

http://www.sxc.hu/

Warm light rain falls, trickled down by tear-drops on my window and I long for you, my unattainable -  Unknown

When I'm Old And Grey

THE rain has taken a toll on Nek Yong. It makes her extremely lazy and writing is the last thing on her mind. For the past weeks, Nek Yong has been lazing around the house sipping tea in the evenings and watching the skies take different shapes and forms at every turn of a second.

When I look at the skies I am reminded of days when my girls were very young. We had a huge single storey bungalow house spread on almost ¼ acre of land, similar to what you see in this picture. The garden was huge that every time the gardener came around he would only finish his gardening as the sun set. At times, he would return the next day to finish up.

Images: House In Cloudy Day-WINBLOWS/Loving You-GiniMiniGi/Happy Cloud-ba1969

 http://www.sxc.hu/

My girls and I love watching the skies. We would sit in the garden and watched the clouds. Every time the clouds made new formations we would shout out what we thought we “saw”.

Sometimes the clouds had eyes, at other times smiling faces. The girls didn’t like it whenever the clouds formed and appeared as monsters or huge unfamiliar beasts. So I often told them about the grizzly beasts I “saw”. There’s nothing like watching the disbelief in their eyes :)

Yes, perhaps all the formations we thought we saw were just our over-imaginative minds at work. But perhaps there are actually living forms in the skies, trapped within the clouds. Whatever it is, sitting in the garden watching the clouds turned into many unimaginable “characters” was probably the most wonderful part of watching the girls grow. Their faces, wide-eyed and grinning from ear to ear showed how the simplest things in life can make a child happy.

Today, Nek Yong’s girls are young adults with a career of their own. Their hours are filled with work, work and more work. They have friends they occasionally hang out with but they will always remain as Nek Yong’s “girls”.

Whenever we have our “compulsory” family-time, we still look at the clouds to see if the faces are still up there, way, way up amidst the skies. And yes, many times we still see the faces and Nek Yong will always cherish these moments.

Maybe one day when Nek Yong is "home" with God, my girls will spend some time watching the clouds with their children, my grandchildren. Maybe my girls will tell their children about the grizzly beasts Nek Yong "saw" in the skies and the naughty winks my girls give each other as they take over my role in fascinating their children with God’s wonders.

               With loving care - Nek Yong 

Quote for Day 44

Clipart: Fire_10 - ARTFAVOR

http://www.openclipart.org/

I defy logic when I'm being stubborn, which is utter foolishness - Anon

Hot Stove And Valentine

Bah humbug ... well that's what I say to Valentine's Day, the second most commercial day of the year following Christmas.

Valentine's Day is simply an opportunity for florists and restaurants to rip us off selling their same ordinary wares at an exorbitant price.

True love would be a home-cooked meal and quality time together as a couple, rather than a noisy commercial environment reaking of desperation to impress!

 Cliparts: Love-KIB/Cook-PETER BROUGH/Happy Heart-KABLAM

http://www.openclipart.org/

Celebrate All You Loving People

IT’S Valentine’s Day and the shopping malls are packed with people in search of a Valentine’s Day present. Rather last-minute I would think but it just goes to show that we all love celebrating love, unlike some crazy enforcement parties who just love creating hatred among us loving people.

By the time I write this post I am almost 150% sure the entire universe already got wind of Malaysia’s mind-boggling interpretation of what’s religious practice and what’s not.

It’s annoying to hear all these squeaky voices from the so-called experts announcing their determination to nab the over-zealous celebrating what the “learned” summarised as a celebration of the Christians.

These people even went on to comment about hotels around town offering overnight stays during the celebration and that this move is seen as encouraging Muslims into vice.

Flyers discouraging Muslims from celebrating were heavily distributed to stress on the negative impact Valentine’s Day brings.

The ones up in arms over Muslims in Malaysia celebrating Valentine’s Day are of course those from the National Fatwa Council and the Malaysian Islamic Development Department (JAKIM).

According to the National Fatwa Council it has been decreed in 2005 that Muslims should refrain from celebrating Valentine’s Day as it is not part of Islamic practice. The Christian Federation of Malaysia then reacted by saying Valentine’s Day has nothing to do with the Christian faith.

Before you know it tons of comments came from various authorities. One party said “don’t celebrate”, another party said “not true” a third party said “go ahead and celebrate”.

WHY can’t you guys – the so-called learned in the field that you are, the “smart” ones, the “know-all” just STOP blowing things out of proportion and make everyone’s life miserable?

Happy Valentine's Day to all, whether you are lovers or haters!

 Cliparts: WingLoveHeart-AUNGKARNS/Pierced Heart-ANONYMOUS

 http://www.openclipart.org/

All those who are celebrating Valentine’s Day just want to have one special day to call their own to express their love – through giving presents, reading out their favourite poem to their wide-eyed love (fathers, mothers, husbands, wives, fiancées, girlfriends, boyfriends, daughters, sons, best-friends, cousins, grannies, grand-dads, pets, plants…).

Leave them be. Let them do what they want. If while celebrating Valentine’s Day the unmarried Muslims got carried away, lost their virginity (as I take it that’s what the Islamic authorities meant when they said “vice”), the married betrayed their husbands or wives it is THEIR sin, not yours!

People commit “vice” every day – in the parks, in the clubs, in private karaoke rooms, in toilets, when they are sad, when they are happy, when they are lonely, when they are bored. So what makes anyone think “vice” happens only on Valentine’s Day?

If I were from these bodies, I would be more triggered and excited about distributing flyers to warn society about the disgrace of committing child abuse, rapes and molestations on the defenceless.

However, the most hilarious statement was the one made by a politician, stating that the campaign against this celebration will continue as they do not want to abandon their mission to save the younger generation from committing sins.

Take it from me, love. If committing sins among Muslims are what you’re concerned about, then it’s not just Muslim youngsters you need to check and keep an eye on. A majority of youngsters have been forced to become adults because adults forget they are no more children and with responsibilities. So keep your opinion about our “easily-swayed” youngsters to yourself. They are doing fine. It’s the adults you need to fix your eyes on.

And you definitely have to work harder with those eyes and look behind “closed doors” because vice happens any day and everywhere; not just on this one day in a year where we actually take the time to express love, with or without “vice” as the additional potent.

Let’s not go anymore into details. Suffice to say if you’re a Muslim and you celebrate Valentine’s Day than you might find the “fingers” of the law moving like car wipers at you.

To the authorities I have this to say. Educating society to change their mindset is a long and tedious process. You must have either patience or know-how or both. But if you are planning on getting your message through by instilling fear then it is high time you wake up and realise that this tactic isn’t society’s cup of tea.

Maybe when the “powers-that-be” go to bed tonight they should ponder on these questions:

If I’m a Muslim - do I come out of my Chinese friends’ house after celebrating Chinese New Year eating pork?

Do I step out of my Hindu friends’ home during Deepavali with putu on my forehead and I stop eating beef?

And do I leave my Christian friends’ house after celebrating Christmas bearing a cross on my chest?

Religion and faith are sacred things. Every one of us knows where we stand in the eyes of God.

Valentine's Food

Valentine’s Day is tomorrow and we know that despite the financial difficulties many of us may be facing some will still want to celebrate this once a year occasion.

We have listed here some of the hotel restaurants and outlets having Valentine’s Day promotions and hope they might be of help to those with last minute plans. If hotel outlets aren’t your cup of tea, then a simple meal for two at the many bustling food areas in and around the city will still have lots to offer.

Have a great Valentine’s Day!

Sunway Resort Hotel & Spa's Valentine's Day offering.

Avanti Restorante at the Sunway Resort Hotel & Spa will feature a 5-course dinner with wine pairing on Valentine’s Day. A little bit on the pricey side, RM460++ per couple, it’s a dinner worth indulging on as the menu has been specially designed by the outlet’s Italian Chef Claudio. Reservations are highly recommended but if this is your last minute decision to celebrate, give it a go.

Avanti Restorante
Sunway Resort Hotel & Spa Persiaran Lagoon
46150 Petaling Jaya
Gen Line: +6 03 7492 8000
Reservations: +6 03 7495 18888

Moments For Two is a special Valentine’s Day package offered at Pullman Putrajaya Lakeside hotel for couples who would love to relive those beautiful moments when they first met.

The package comprises a 2D/1N stay at the hotel’s Spa Concept Room inclusive of buffet breakfast and a choice of 60 minutes relaxing massage or facial with herbal steam bath and a romantic Valentine’s Day set dinner by the lake at The Village. Price is at RM680nett for two persons.

But if you’d like to forgo the stay and enjoy just a Valentine’s dinner instead there’s the Romancing By The Lake four-course set dinner offered. This special celebration is at RM145++ per person and is available from 6.30pm to 10.30pm.

Pullman Putrajaya Lakeside
No. 2 Jalan P5/5,     Presint 5, Putrajaya
Reservations at +6 03 8890 0000

Beautiful food presentation for Valentine's Day at Sunway Resort Hotel & Spa.

Other entries celebrating Valentine’s Day:

Le Meridien Kuala Lumpur
The hotel’s outlets have several Valentine’s Day dinner promotions - Latest Recipe (RM138+ per person); Favola (RM300+ per couple), Prime (RM398++ per couple). Reservations at +6 03 2263 7434.

The Legend Hotel & Residences, Kuala Lumpur
Valentine’s Day Buffet dinner at RM98++ per person. Reservations at +6 03 4042 9888

Ancasa Hotel & Spa, Kuala Lumpur
Valentine’s Dinner at the hotel’s Casa Restaurant & Bar with Azwan Ali and Didie Alias at RM90++ per person. It comes with a for-course meal. Reservations at +6 03 2026 6060.

Swiss Garden Hotel, Kuala Lumpur
Valentine’s Day dinner at the hotel’s Green Treats Café at RM260++. Reservations at +6 03 2141 3333

Mandarin Oriental, Kuala Lumpur
The Mandarin Grill Valentine’s Day menu is at RM321++ per couple while the Cascade Restaurant & Bar’s Valentine’s Day menu is at RM288++ per couple. Reservations at +6 03 2380 8888.

Eating Istanbul

Story & Photos by kampunghouse

This article is part of a series of recollections of Istanbul, more of which can be found on the writer's website www.kampunghouse.wordpress.com

It was barely two hours ago that I was on the plane hovering over the Istanbul skyline, and now I found myself sitting on a bench at the Uskudar pier, enjoying the warm sunshine, the blue waters of the Bosphorus and the wonderful realization that I am really on holiday.

I was waiting for Ekin, my Turkish host for the next two days. It would be my first time staying with someone I’ve never met, and thus I was busy crafting jokes in case our conversation descends to an awkward halt.

The joke-crafting session was interminably disrupted by the scenery ahead of me – women in colourful silk shawls boarding the ferries, the extravagant Dolmabahce Palace across the Bosphorus, the mass of buildings vying for top spot along the hills of Istanbul.

A trolley filled with delicious breads and pastries.

I thought to myself how wonderful it would be if this sumptuous scenery was accompanied by a delicious snack.  I spotted a red trolley selling an array of bread and pastries, and not really knowing what they were, simply pointed to the smiling bread seller.

I bought a simit – a type of Turkish bagel topped with sesame seeds and pogaça (po-a-cha), a plain savoury pastry with a tantalising golden brown crust. Both had a dense, satisfying crumb that was a world away from the limp, plastic bread often found in Asian bakeries.

As I was enjoying my snack, I felt a sudden tap on my back.

“Hello, how are you?”     
                                                                                          
“Oh, hello Ekin! Nice to finally meet you,” I replied to Ekin.

“I see you’ve had something to eat,” Ekin said.

Turkish Bagel.

“Yes I have,” I replied again.

There was an uncomfortable silence for a while before Ekin said, “OK then, let’s go to my house so you can drop your luggage.”

I think the time has come to unleash my arsenal of jokes.

Later in the evening, I found myself waiting once again, this time in front of Burger King at the start of Istiklal Avenue, the commercial centre of the city. One of the effects of globalisation is that one can now find McDonald’s, Burger King and the rest of their ilk at every major city, even deeply romanticised capitals like Istanbul. Their bland familiarity takes away some of the excitement of visiting a foreign land, but I have to admit their bright lights and unmistakeable signpost make for a great landmark.

The evening crowd at Istiklal Avenue.

I was waiting for Mikayil, an Azerbaijani living in Istanbul, in search of a restorative winter drink called sahlep. It is a hot drink made from the dried starchy powder of wild orchids found in Turkey, and has a taste similar to vanilla chai latte – only a lot thicker. Due to its popularity, wild orchids have become expensive and increasingly hard to find, so many of the sahlep drinks now have been rather crudely thickened with cornstarch.

We settled for Ozsut, a modish patisserie overflowing with cakes, ice cream and traditional Turkish sweets. Despite the temptation I stuck with my sahlep, though we also ordered a plate of profiteroles doused with chocolate sauce to share. It was an indulgent end to my first night in Istanbul, harking back to the excessive days of Ottoman court life, but what is a holiday if not a revolt against moderation?

Quote for Day 43

Images: Red Hearts-EVOBRAINED / Cats In Love-NELLART / Amor-JMJVICENTE

http://www.sxc.hu/

True love sticks through thick and thin - Anon